Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Day 5

Writing. Is. Hard.  Writing every day is even harder.  It's so easy to get wrapped up in all of the "gotta do's" throughout the day.  Gotta write this email, grade these papers, make these copies, fill out some forms, get ready for the sub, go to practice, read these articles, blogs, books, lessons, gotta cook, gotta clean, gotta go go go!!! All day. Until you gotta go to bed and wake up and repeat.  It has been a challenge to make myself stop.  Breathe.  Sit.  Think.

Apart from the go! go! go! of the daily rush, I have to stop and think about what to write.  What do I have to talk about that's worth saying?  What do I have to add to the world?  What can I share that will make someone else want to write, or just smile?  I have no idea most days.

Today I think I'll talk about the parts of the day I decided to sit. breathe. think.  The most important thing I have had to learn as a first year teacher, is to relax.  Breathe!  It sounds so silly.  It's common sense.  But the hardest lesson that I just can't seem to master is to relax and let go.  So, little by little, I am getting better.  I am remembering to take some moments for myself.  This morning, after I sprinted through the house getting ready because I overslept (again), after driving to school at almost 90 mph so I wasn't late, I just sat.  I sat down, took a breath, and watched the RARE "rain" drip down the window.  It was really more of a light drizzle, but out here in west Texas, we're lucky to get a drop at all.

My next moment of peace, really just a moment to slow down the day, was during an ARD.  I got to sit in with a fantastic student who really works hard and pushes to be better every day. It was nice to sit and listen to their plans for the future and to be able to tell their mom how much I appreciate her kid.  The pride on my student's face at being noticed for their achievements, not faults, was such a refreshing moment.

Much, much later

I did not finish this post, or my challenge, obviously.  But I will get better at this.  As usual, the gotta-dos got me.  The end of the year just keeps getting crazier and fuller.  Again, I am trying my best to cherish my breathing moments.  Today my friend and I both forgot our lunches and were going to hurry over to the bbq place across the street.  As we walk out the door, I am taken aback by the beauty and awesome wonderfulness of the day.  I don't think that's a word, but it was so gorgeous.  Sunny and warm, the grass is green, the birds are out, for the first time in a week it hasn't been brown and windy and dirty.  Just a beautiful, peaceful, gorgeous afternoon walk to the car.... and then rush rush rush to the bbq place, rush back, rush to eat, and off to class again!! The crazy rush makes each little moment that much better though.